Walking cast related complaint #64...concerning the number of perfectly decent men...men who, I'm sure, in the daily run of things are kind to their mothers and stray kittens...and who would not normally make disparaging comments on a stranger's clothes (to their face, at any rate)...that have taken to walking up to me and, with all the wittiness at their disposal, letting me know that "your shoes don't match". True raconteurs can be identified by the follow-up line (if the limited selection of shoes that I possess whose heel height matches the cast has dictated that tan suede Chelsea boots go with the rest of the outfit...as opposed to their black leather brethren) by the line "didn't anyone tell you that black doesn't go with brown?"

Something that was merely not that amusing the first, second, or third times I heard it has become downright annoying after the thirtieth rendition. I get it...you're the spiritual love child of Oscar Wilde, Peter Ustinov, and Mark Twain...now, for the love of God, let me hobble around in relative peace...